Let’s Be Friends

Introducing “Jenn”, the straight talking BFF you need for women’s health.

Hello ladies! I’m Jenn. We should be friends; the kind of friends who don’t have to whisper when we say words our mothers might not have ever uttered in public. Or in private for that matter.

I don’t believe in sugarcoating anything; women’s health in particular. Maybe it’s because I was raised in rural Indiana. My mother shoved a box of tampons in my hands when I was 12 and told me to read the instructions. When I got married, she gave me a kiss on the cheek and wished me luck.

It’s no wonder I’ve had my share of what used to be called “female problems.” I agonized over my annual exams and ignored pain until I couldn’t stand it anymore because I was embarrassed to drop my drawers for my doctor. I’ve gotten over all of that but I’m afraid you haven’t.

Why do I think your vagina is my business? Because if we’re too scared to talk about our health, we’re probably also not getting the regular care we all need.

Dramatic? Not really. Experts say 14,000 of us will get cervical cancer this year, and 4,000 of us will die from it. Got a Book Club or Bunco group? Statistics say one of your group will get breast cancer. More than 266,000 women will get a breast cancer diagnosis this year; nearly 41,000 will die from it this year.

So, yeah. We need to talk. I’ll be here, talking out loud about the biggies like cancer and anything else you’re wondering about:

• When you can safely stop getting your annual exam
• Why you pee a little bit when you laugh or sneeze these days
• Good discharge v. bad discharge
• STDs: they’re not just for teenagers anymore

Who am I to be the one to tell you about this stuff? I’m not a doctor. I’m just Jenn. I’m the first to admit that I don’t have all the answers. But you’re not even asking the questions about your va-jay-jay, your hoo-hah, your front-butt, your pee-pee, whatever you call it.

I’m not going to call it any of those names, though. And if I get my way, you won’t either.

Say it with me: “Vuh-JI-nah.” That wasn’t so hard, was it?